Whatever it takes, I want to stop listening to sports talk radio when I’m driving. It happened again last week.
My wife and I were cruising somewhere (probably shopping since she was in charge of directions) and I’m listening to sports talk radio. I was switching back and forth until it came time when WTMJ was the only station with sports talk.
It was someone who calls himself the Big Unit, clearly a shabby double entendre designed to confuse and titillate. The Big Unit is one of those guys who apparently have not learned that having an electronic microphone means you don’t have to SHOUT TO BE HEARD ON THE RADIO. He obviously thinks loud means smart, forceful, certain or confident. Instead it only makes him seem loud.
Anyhow, the Big Unit was talking about the Bucks.
Now, as we all know WTMJ has the radio contract to be the flagship station for Bucks broadcasts. They’ve got the wonderful Ted Davis and Dennis Krause (during home games) doing the broadcasts. They do a great job. And you’d figure that this station might have some intelligent insight into what is causing the slow start for the Bucks.
It’s not a secret that injuries have played a big role. Both Bobby Simmons and now Charley Villanueva have been sidelined for weeks. And it’s tough to get everyone on the same page when you have a bunch of new players.
But there wasn’t much insight this night from the Big Unit.
First he said, “Now, I’m not calling for the firing of Terry Stotts…”
That’s like when your teacher said to you, “Now, I don’t mean to make an example of you to the rest of the class, but…” You damn well know what’s coming and you brace for the worst.
Well, I held onto the steering wheel with white knuckles as I braced for the Big Unit to open the issue of firing the coach while the number of games in an interminably long season was still in single digits.
The Big Unit had opened this can of worms, and he was bound to bluster through. And bluster is a perfectly fitting word.
“If the Bucks decide to make a coaching change,” the Unit said, “they could go after Larry Brown.”
Then he virtually shouted into the microphone.
“TALK ABOUT YOUR INSTANT STREET CRED!!!!!!
That was the Big Unit showing you how urban and hip he was by saying “street cred.” Of course, in English, what he meant was that Brown would provide instant credibility with Bucks fans.
I couldn’t believe that anyone would actually say what he had said.
My wife looked at me with fear in her eyes, as I wildly jerked the steering wheel left and right and alternately hit the brake and the accelerator with seeming abandon. Cars around me screeched away from my erratic path.
“Is he nuts?” I shouted out the window. “Larry Brown is the guy who took an average Knick basketball team and in one season lost more games than this proud franchise had ever lost, created chaos among the players, battled with management and generally helped to create situation for which the only solution was to blow it up and start all over again.”
I saw some people huddled under a bus stop, watching me with a mixture of anticipation and horror. As we jerked past the bus stop, I shouted at the people waiting.
“This guy spent the final year coaching the Detroit title team in a protracted feud with his bosses as he flirted with other teams about coaching jobs and drove himself into the hospital suffering from, among other things, megalomania.”
Larry Brown would cost a fortune, he has bad health, and his record shows he’s good with veteran teams, not young ones like the Bucks.
I glanced at my wife, who had her eyes shut tight and one arm braced against the dashboard. I took a series of deep breaths.
I finally settled down and turned the radio to listen to the right-wing rantings of Sean Hannity. And I hate listening to Sean Hannity.
With a history in Milwaukee stretching back decades, Dave tries to bring a unique perspective to his writing, whether it's sports, politics, theater or any other issue.
He's seen Milwaukee grow, suffer pangs of growth, strive for success and has been involved in many efforts to both shape and re-shape the city. He's a happy man, now that he's quit playing golf, and enjoys music, his children and grandchildren and the myriad of sports in this state. He loves great food and hates bullies and people who think they are smarter than everyone else.
This whole Internet thing continues to baffle him, but he's willing to play the game as long as OnMilwaukee.com keeps lending him a helping hand. He is constantly amazed that just a few dedicated people can provide so much news and information to a hungry public.
Despite some opinions to the contrary, Dave likes most stuff. But he is a skeptic who constantly wonders about the world around him. So many questions, so few answers.
