By Paul Feyertag, Marquette University High School   Published Jun 05, 2003 at 5:09 AM

Within the seemingly fluorescent bureaucracy that is the city of Milwaukee, there exists a phantasmal conglomeratic force, extending its sometimes sulfurous tendrils throughout the utopia that is the Milwaukee music Mecca: garage bands.

Unfortunately, determining the impact garage bands have upon a modern society is a dicey affair.  As such, I enlisted the aid of Francis Graf and Ross Lorenz of the band Thrill Issues to aid me in this endeavor by conveying through conversation their perspective on this issue, being actual members of an actual garage band. 

In the ensuing conversation, we discussed the multiple societal levels on which garage bands exercise their powers of influence.

"It's almost smaller than a local level, it's almost like a neighborhood level because a garage band has the angry (guy) on your block who doesn't want to hear it. You've got the kids around the block who sort of know you're there, you've got the people that walk by with their dogs while you're practicing," explained Lorenz. 

So, the run-of-the-mill garage band can certainly annoy people out of their minds within a single neighborhood in a Twisted Sister-esque manner, which is a paradox considering nobody knows of their existence.

Conversely, perhaps the garage band in question actually has talent, and maybe they sound reasonably solid so as to attract a small neighborhood following.  This cedes naturally into another direct effect of garage bands, that is, the creation of an intimate musical environment.  This close-knit environment enhances any and all affects that a garage band may have on their audience in a way that larger artists can't possibly accommodate.  Graf put it nicely:  "You can't go to a Creed concert and hang out with Creed after the show." {INSERT_RELATED}

Regardless of the small sphere of influence commandeered by the typical garage band, the positive extent of its influence is ageless, i.e. the positive effects of garage bands are pan-generational.  This is particularly evident through the garage band's almost divine ability to cause members of the adult generation to become puffy-eyed and wax nostalgic, their minds overwhelmed with memories of their protoplasmic teenage years, a time beyond time, an Eden, a Golden Age Mesopotamia.  "…I…I…I…I played in a band once… (sniff)"

Therefore, it would be safe to say that en masse, garage bands can claim to have a formidable effect upon the great majority of the populace, whether they connect musically, nostalgically/musically or simply because their ears perpetually bleed.  Still, most garage bands can't claim to leave a wake of enlightened concertgoers.  Having said that, your dear author must conclude that while most garage bands don't routinely fabricate life-changing experiences or serve zealously as a musical outlet for the cultural underground, in the very least, they can make the great and all too commonplace sacrifice, and, for a short while, become the fodder for fits of memorable laughter.