PHOENIX -- Nearly two decades after its release, the movie "Bull Durham" remains tattooed on the brains of baseball fans and sports movie buffs.

One of the more memorable scenes in the film takes place when Durham Bulls pitching coach Larry Hockett visits a group of players surrounding pitching prospect "Nuke" LaLoosh and catcher Crash Davis on the mound. The following dialog ensues:

Larry: Excuse me, but what the hell's going on out here?
Crash Davis: Well, Nuke's scared because his eyelids are jammed and his old man's here. We need a live... is it a live rooster?
[Jose nods]
Crash Davis: . We need a live rooster to take the curse off Jose's glove and nobody seems to know what to get Millie or Jimmy for their wedding present.
[to the players]
Crash Davis: Is that about right?
[the players nod]
Crash Davis: We're dealing with a lot of s---.
Larry: Okay, well, uh... candlesticks always make a nice gift, and uh, maybe you could find out where she's registered and maybe a place-setting or maybe a silverware pattern. Okay, let's get two! Go get 'em.

Since virtually every player and coach in the major leagues has seen the movie, some of them several dozen times, and since spring training provides a perfect backdrop for lighthearted tales, we decided to ask a few current Brewers if they've had any memorable meetings on the mound.

Surprisingly, many players were stumped. "It's pretty much all-business out there," reliever Matt Wise said. "When they come out to the mound when I'm out there, it's usually not good. I don't think I can help you."

Veteran catcher Damian Miller did. "My favorite was when I was with the Diamondbacks," Miller said. "Todd Stottlemyre was pitching and Mark Connor was our pitching coach. Stott was getting hit around pretty good. When Connor came out, Stott got mad and said ‘What the (expletive) are you doing out here?' Connor looked at him and said ‘I was just going to ask you the same thing.' That's when I lost it. I couldn't stop laughing."

Whether it's the advent of TV cameras, the money involved or the personality of the players, laughter seems more rare on the field these days.

"Guys are so uptight these days for some reason," catcher Johnny Estrada said. "You've got to pick and choose your personalities that you can joke with out there. Even the guys that sometimes you think you could, they are still tight. I guess no manager or coach wants to see a guy laughing out there on the mound."

Sometimes, however, laughter can help break the tension.

"I've had some coaches in the minor leagues who realize that a pitcher is so nervous and tense that they'll go out there and say something stupid just to get the guy to relax," shortstop J.J. Hardy said.

The late Don Rowe, a Brewers pitching coach under Phil Garner in the 1990s, used that tactic often. During one game, Rowe walked to the mound to visit with Cal Eldred and spun on his heel and returned to the dugout almost immediately upon arriving.

After the game, Rowe told reporters what he said: "I just looked at him and said "Aren't you Cal Eldred?" and he said ‘Yeah." I said ‘That's what I thought,' and I turned around and went back to the bench."

Brewers instructor Jim Gantner had another Rowe classic. "I don't remember who the pitcher was, but he pulled something in his arm or his shoulder and ‘Skid' (Rowe) came out and said ‘Does it hurt?' The guy said ‘Yeah, a little.' And Skid said, ‘Does it hurt when you smile?' The guy said, ‘No.' So Skid told him ‘Good. Then smile and throw the next pitch.'"

Milwaukee pitching coach Mike Maddux, whose visits to the mound often feature a gentle hand on the pitcher's non-throwing shoulder, had a few memories from his playing and coaching career.

"I have told guys that they need to tighten up because the outfielders are getting tired out there," Maddux said. "And, I once had a pitching coach tell me ‘It looks like you're working hard out there." I said ‘Yeah, I am,' and he said ‘Don't work so hard.'"

One of Maddux's more memorable exchanges came when he was pitching at County Stadium in Milwaukee.

"We'd had a rain delay and (pitching coach) Claude Osteen came out and said ‘I'm hungry. Get this guy out. I'm hungry.' I looked at (first baseman) Eric Karros and he said ‘That's the worst mound meeting I've ever heard.'"

On another occasion, Maddux was on the mound when his shortstop called timeout and informed him that the batter at the plate couldn't hit a forkball. Maddux had one question: "How do you hold it?"

Some mound meetings are meant to kill time so that a reliever can prepare to enter the game. Others are to discuss bunt strategies or sign changes. Sometimes, managers will visit pitchers to "send a message." Usually, the message is simple: throw strikes.

"When I go to the mound for a first visit, they're pretty much getting an earful," Brewers manager Ned Yost said. "Unless it's a situation where we're talking about a defense or something... that's different. But, when I go out for a first visit, they're usually getting an ass-chewing."

At times, the manager or pitching coach can place a catcher in an uncomfortable situation on the mound. He'll ask ‘Does he have anything left?' and the catcher has to decide between loyalty to the pitcher and honesty.

"I usually wait until we're walking off the mound and then I'll tell the manager or the pitching coach ‘He's done.'" Miller said.

Yost, a former catcher, doesn't put his catchers in that position.

"I don't ask the catchers," he said. "I don't stand out there and say "Hey, has he got anything left?" I know. I look in the pitcher's eyes and see.

Most of the time, what I'll do is, if I'm going to make a move and I'm dead set on it, I don't wait until I go out there. I'll do it before I get to the line. Then there is no arguing. The move has already been done.

If I still haven't made my mind up, I'll go talk to the pitcher. Sometimes, I'll make a move. Sometimes, I won't. But, I don't ask the catcher."

When fundamentals or sign changes are discussed, Hardy and/or Weeks are required to go to the mound. When a pitcher is getting yelled at for not being aggressive, he usually stands alone. Yost said the infielders can sense when they are needed at the conference.

"They know if it's a fundamental thing or a play," he said. "If it's an ass-chewing, they know that, too. There is something about my walk."

Shortstop Craig Counsell doesn't like mound conferences in general.

"I kind of like standing by myself out there when everybody else goes to the mound," he said. "I don't like being around nervous pitchers."

When right-hander Ben Hendrickson gets nervous, Hardy has a way to try and calm him.

"Sometimes, he'd walk two guys and I'd go in there to the mound and put my glove over my mouth and act like I was talking and I wouldn't say anything," Hardy said. "He'd look at me like he was waiting for me to say something. I'd say ‘Good talk.' And go back."

Occasionally, you'll see players at a mound conference laughing. "Sometimes, guys are looking at girls in the stands and might make a comment about... I can't say," Estrada said. "But, a lot of times, that's it."

Hardy said that sometimes infielders will share a laugh at the back of the mound, outside earshot of the pitcher. "That's just us having fun sometimes," Hardy said.

In most cases, the mound conferences are instantly erased. Sometimes, though, they become immortal.

"The funniest one I ever heard about was Mark Portugal," Miller said. "He was pitching in Cincinnati and he gave up a home run and they set off fireworks. The next batter came up; home run. More fireworks. The third batter came up; home run. More fireworks. The pitching coach came out and Portugal said ‘What are you possibly going to tell me?' and the coach said ‘Nothing. I just want to give the fireworks guy a chance to reload.' That's a classic."